"It wasn't supposed to be like this, it wasn't. She was
supposed to be here today. I was supposed to have time to make up for my
mistakes" he paused his crying, took another gulp and resumed.
"What happened? Where is she?" I asked him.
"She is dead. Gone, forever. I don't know what happened. She must have gone thinking that "I" happened. Trust me I didn't want any of this for her. I wanted to treat her like a princess. I was supposed to protect her from the world and I couldn't protect her from my own self". His voice became steadier and steadier as he indulged in a conversation with his shadow self. I didn't say anything, I knew I didn't need to. He stared out of the window for a while, down at expensive cars in the parking lane. I knew he must have brought her here, they both shared a love for flavors other than 'spicy' and 'chilli'. He must have seen some guy opening door for some girl, for a brief moment a small gap appeared between his pursed lips and he tilted his head in a nod. His next words confirmed my imagination.
"She always praised me for being a gentleman you know. She liked being respected, cared for, treated like a proper lady" He raised the bottle to his lips again. He was going to drown himself in sorrow tonight and I was going to let him do it. Sometimes that is exactly what you have to do if you know your friends well.
"I want another chance at life, I want to give her the life I promised her, I want to make her laugh. I swear to God I would never hurt her the way I did, I don't know how I became this mad man who would keep thinking about himself and not enough about her. I don't know when I lost it all. I used to be so nice and caring towards her, I don't know how or when did I start hurting her so much". He was crying, like literally crying. I had never seen the man shed a tear before but there he was. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"It's not your fault mate. Her life was not in your hands".
He put his bottle back and crossed his hands and then he looked at me with eyes that shattered something inside him as well as inside me.
"It wasn't an accident, it was a suicide"
"What happened? Where is she?" I asked him.
"She is dead. Gone, forever. I don't know what happened. She must have gone thinking that "I" happened. Trust me I didn't want any of this for her. I wanted to treat her like a princess. I was supposed to protect her from the world and I couldn't protect her from my own self". His voice became steadier and steadier as he indulged in a conversation with his shadow self. I didn't say anything, I knew I didn't need to. He stared out of the window for a while, down at expensive cars in the parking lane. I knew he must have brought her here, they both shared a love for flavors other than 'spicy' and 'chilli'. He must have seen some guy opening door for some girl, for a brief moment a small gap appeared between his pursed lips and he tilted his head in a nod. His next words confirmed my imagination.
"She always praised me for being a gentleman you know. She liked being respected, cared for, treated like a proper lady" He raised the bottle to his lips again. He was going to drown himself in sorrow tonight and I was going to let him do it. Sometimes that is exactly what you have to do if you know your friends well.
"I want another chance at life, I want to give her the life I promised her, I want to make her laugh. I swear to God I would never hurt her the way I did, I don't know how I became this mad man who would keep thinking about himself and not enough about her. I don't know when I lost it all. I used to be so nice and caring towards her, I don't know how or when did I start hurting her so much". He was crying, like literally crying. I had never seen the man shed a tear before but there he was. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"It's not your fault mate. Her life was not in your hands".
He put his bottle back and crossed his hands and then he looked at me with eyes that shattered something inside him as well as inside me.
"It wasn't an accident, it was a suicide"
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